Friday, January 20, 2012
how to deal with this shit. step by step process..
hopefully with this in place. itwill help me in the future..
day 0.
eyes are smirking. hurts to stare at anything. feel tired. wish i could just give in just now to the tears. but didnt so now the feelings past. just emptiness atm. this bliss will not last. now still strong. should drink alochol. moare alcohol and game somemore. have to deal with awkward moments where parents ask me to ask her out.. not to future self. should always go out with a bang. dont let them see you beat down. i dont know what else is there to do.. i dont want to game. i dont want to drink.. i dont want to do anything.. this sucks..
this really is a meaningless drone.. my eyes are aching even more.. the thing about picking up drinking again when u quit... it just dosent go down as well anymore. i still appreaciate it.. but i rather drink with company.. or maybe i just like beer now.. but johnny walker has always been there for me... stupid stupid stupid.. headache the whole day still here to stay.
love kills slowly 12:12 am
